Stories at work: pitches and presentations
Turn a deck nobody remembers into two minutes people repeat. Learn the four beats of a work story (problem, struggle, solution, result) and why one named person beats the word "users".
THE SHAPE
Problem, struggle, solution, result
Four beats. Problem: someone has a real difficulty, with a face and a cost. Struggle: what they tried, and why it didn't work. Solution: what changed, told as an action rather than a feature list. Result: what is different now, with one concrete fact. It is the shape from lesson 3 in a work shirt: setup, confrontation, resolution, change.
Most decks give only beats three and four: here is our product, here are our numbers. That is exactly why nobody remembers them. With no problem and no struggle, nothing is at stake, and lesson 2 already told you what happens then.
Four beats, one real example
- Problem
Farzaneh runs the reception desk at a small clinic in Karaj. Every morning she phones forty patients to remind them of their appointment. About a quarter never pick up, and those are the ones who don't turn up.
- Struggle
She moved the calls to the evening. The no-shows stayed the same and she got home at eight. The clinic printed reminder cards instead. Patients lost them.
- Solution
We gave her one screen: tomorrow's list, one tap, a text message to each patient with the time and the doctor's name.
- Result
Last month she made six calls instead of forty, and she leaves at five. The clinic's empty slots are down by about a third, which for them is roughly eleven appointments a week.
Check yourself
Which beat is each line doing?
Show the answer
- "She phones forty people every morning and a quarter never pick up." → Problem
- "We tried evening calls. Same no-shows, longer days." → Struggle
- "One screen, one tap, a text to every patient." → Solution
- "Six calls instead of forty, and she leaves at five." → Result
ONE PERSON
Not "users". Someone with a name.
"Our users struggle with the settings page" is a sentence nobody can picture, so nobody feels it. Swap the plural for one person, named, doing one thing at one particular moment. A room can listen to a person. It cannot listen to a category. This is lesson 2's rule, personal beats global, standing in a meeting room.
"Users" becomes "Farzaneh, at the reception desk, at ten past eight on a Saturday morning". Same finding. Now there is someone in the room.
The same finding, two ways
A category
Our data shows a significant proportion of users abandon the process at the document upload step, which negatively impacts overall conversion.
A person
Farzaneh reached the upload screen with a photo of a prescription on her phone. It was rejected three times for being too large. She gave up and phoned us instead. About one in three people stop at that screen.
Check yourself
Sara is presenting research to her team. Her slide says: "Users find the settings page confusing." The room nods and moves on. What would make it land?
- Open with thirty seconds of one user: what she wanted, and where she got stuck
- Put the percentage who said so on the slide, in a larger font
- Use a stronger word than confusing, such as frustrating
- Show a screenshot of the settings page with every confusing control labelled on it
Show the answer
Open with thirty seconds of one user: what she wanted, and where she got stuck
Yes. One named person doing one thing at one moment gives the room something to picture. The percentage goes in straight afterwards, and now it means something.
"Farzaneh runs reception at a clinic in Karaj. Every morning she phones forty patients about their appointments. A quarter never pick up, and those are the ones who don't turn up.
She moved the calls to the evening. Nothing changed, except that she got home at eight. The clinic printed reminder cards, and patients lost them.
We gave her one screen: tomorrow's list, one tap, a text to every patient.
Last month: six calls instead of forty. She leaves at five, and the clinic's empty slots are down by about a third."Sixty seconds, four beats, one person.
Problem 3 sentences · Struggle 2 · Solution 1 · Result 2.
The product appears exactly once, as an action ("one tap, a text"), never as a list of features.
Every number belongs to Farzaneh's clinic, so it lands on a scene the room can already see.The solution is the shortest beat. Beginners spend most of their time there. The room needs the problem and the struggle far more, because that is where the reason to care lives.
The result (your proof)
The one concrete fact that shows the change is real. One number, not a dashboard, and preferably the number a person in the story would notice: hours, calls, days of waiting, things lost. If you don't have a number yet, say plainly what is different, and say that it is early.
Weak: "engagement improved significantly". Strong: "six calls instead of forty". Honest and still strong: "two weeks in, one clinic, six calls instead of forty".
Check yourself
Proof the room can use, or a vague claim?
- Password tickets went from about ninety a week to twelve.
- The new flow is significantly better and far more intuitive.
- Three of the five pharmacies that tried it are still using it four months later.
- This represents a real step change in how we serve our customers.
- It's early: two weeks, one clinic, six calls instead of forty.
- Feedback has been overwhelmingly positive right across the board.
Show the answer
Proof: Password tickets went from about ninety a week to twelve., Three of the five pharmacies that tried it are still using it four months later., It's early: two weeks, one clinic, six calls instead of forty.
Vague claim: The new flow is significantly better and far more intuitive., This represents a real step change in how we serve our customers., Feedback has been overwhelmingly positive right across the board.
Check yourself
A pitch is stronger if most of your time goes on the solution, since that is what you are asking people to back.
Show the answer
False
False. The solution is usually the shortest beat. People back a solution only once they feel the problem, and the problem and the struggle are what build that feeling. If most of your minutes are going into features, move them into the person who needed those features.
The same four beats, other rooms
- Standup: what was blocked, what I tried, what I changed, what is green now. Thirty seconds.
- An interview answer: the situation, what made it hard, what you did, what happened. Interviewers are asking for exactly this shape.
- An email asking for a decision: one short paragraph of problem and struggle, then the ask on a line of its own.
- A project update: lead with the person the project is for, not the percentage complete.
Check yourself
Reza has five minutes with his manager to ask for the budget for a second delivery van. Which opening uses this lesson best?
- "I'd like to talk about our capacity constraints and the growth we've seen this quarter, and what that means for the delivery team going into next year."
- "Here are three quotes for a van, with the cheapest one highlighted."
- "Our delivery times are up by about forty percent on last year, as you can see in this chart."
- "On Tuesday Mrs Ebrahimi's order sat in the depot until four, because the van was in Karaj. She phoned to cancel."
Show the answer
"On Tuesday Mrs Ebrahimi's order sat in the depot until four, because the van was in Karaj. She phoned to cancel."
Yes. One named person, one Tuesday, one cost the manager can feel. The quotes and the chart still come. They come once the room cares.
Lesson recap
- A work story has four beats: problem, struggle, solution, result. Most decks skip the first two.
- The solution is the shortest beat. The problem and the struggle are where the reason to care is built.
- Replace "users" with one named person doing one thing at one moment.
- Close with one concrete fact, not a dashboard. Say when it is early.
- Don't invent the person and don't oversell the result. A wrong number costs more than a small one.